becoming a yogi

Time has passed since my last blog entry. I have questioned the quality of my thoughts and reserved myself into fully believing that "the more I learn, the less I know". It's quite beautiful really.

I realized recently that my life changed after Yoga School. It was the spiritual awakening that I could feel coming the previous year. I recall telling a friend that I felt like I was "standing on the brink of a big change", and then it happened - 9 months later.

While in Yoga School, I found and embraced a much needed Restorative Yoga practice. I resisted it for years, and thankfully the pull was stronger than my resist.
In the middle of my teacher training last July, I took a class and settled into a comfortable restorative posture and recall the teacher's voice slowly fading away...
My mind started to travel. It began with where I was at the particular time: at Yoga Teacher Training, in Austin, restoring my body. I then drifted to thoughts of why I was there: this took me much deeper. I recalled my classical ballet studies that started for me at age 5 and continue until age 18. The first time I stepped on a yoga mat, I remember being very comfortable as I was naturally flexible and loved the discipline and concentration that I felt, which reminded me of my ballet classes. I remember feeling very excited about the idea of becoming a yogi. It just seemed so right.
My body sunk deeper into my Restorative yoga pose and then, for the first time in a very long time I remembered that as a child I wanted to be a nun. I was raised Catholic. I loved attending mass and Sunday school as a child. I decided, around what must have been age 7 or 8 that I should become a nun. The idea of serving a higher power was in me, even at a young age. The idea of become a nun faded as I grew older, as did my Catholic faith.
My awareness came back to the present and I realized that I had tuned out the teacher. I began to focus on the present. I was in awe as I realized that the teacher was talking about "transformations". The same idea that was filtering through my mind at that moment. Transformation.

What leads you to your path? Where do you travel before you get there? What interests pull you to firmly stand in the place you are meant to be? How does life transform you?

There is a beautiful awareness that comes in the moments in which we allow ourselves to stand still. To connect, reflect and realize. And in that beautiful moment, I realized I was exactly where I was supposed to be. Walking the path to my true self. Yoga found me and changed everything.

Oh my!

 

Oh Marfa, just as dreamy as I remember it.

Last week my Sister and I decided to go on a last minute mission to Marfa. We talked about taking the trip since this Summer but could never really "find the time", so we simply "made" the time. We shuffled and cleared our schedules to travel together for a few days.

DAY 1: We drove, in the pitch black of the night, to Marfa, Texas, through the windy dark roads of the Davis Mountains to our first destination: Thunderbird Hotel!

 

We arrive at the Thunderbird, explored our minimal, modern, yet vintage feeling hotel room (Marci thought it was more like "a dorm room") and then drove 10 minutes outside of Marfa to find the "Mystery Lights". And find them we did! At the Marfa Lights observation point we ventured out into the cold night air along with a handful of other spectators. One person saw a light and said "look there it is!!" as we all stared in complete awe and silence at the tiny light dancing across the landscape in front of us and then it disappeared just as quickly as it appeared. Soon after, another light appeared! Then two lights! Each light appearing on the horizon, moving, and then disappearing into thin air. wow!

I have been to Marfa a few times, but can't recall ever being impacted by the visibility of the night sky in lovely West Texas until now. The sky seems larger, brighter, and closer out there. The night sky was pitch black, powerful, and absolutely gorgeous. Definitely a sight, a vision, that seems more like a dream now. 

At one point I turned to my Sister and said "I feel so small out here."

The stars spread from the horizon in the east all the way across the sky to the horizon in the west. They were bright and seemed so close, so alive. We saw 4 shooting stars.

As we drove back into town, we saw even more Marfa Mystery Lights along the way. Dancing on the horizon beside the highway.

After our Mystery Lights adventure, we found a place in town called Planet Marfa where we stopped to have a drink and sit under a teepee warmed by a fire. It was the perfect ending to a beautiful day.

DAY 2: We woke up and had a lovely breakfast at the Thunderbird Lodge. The meal was complete with organic and non-dairy milks, tea/coffee, cereal, berry fruit salad, and toast. All served family style in large bowl with recycled compostable utensils and plates.

Then, off to the Chinati Foundation! We toured the first 2 buildings of Judd's collection: 100 aluminum works housed in two converted Fort D.A. Russell artillery sheds.

The works were minimal, modern, yet timeless -- and completely beautiful. Our tour group was 6 people so we were able to take our time in each building. The aluminum works were each different and unique in their own ways. Some straight rectangles with opening on the long or short sides, some with one side recessed back into the piece, and others with only 3 sides, inner rectangles, slanted walls, negative space, and so much more. Each piece measuring 51" x 41" was symmetrically installed between the building's columns and large floor tiles. Juxtaposed against the custom windows that Judd installed that measured 5x4'. Hmmmm..

Outside we could see Judd's cast concrete "boxes" in the distance just off Highway 67. The permanent pieces were some of Judd's first pieces in the area.

We saw Dan Flavin's work as well. (No commentary about said works.)

Then off to Fat Lyle's food trailer where we had the most delicious cucumber and tomato sandwiches!
After lunch our plan was to drive out to Cibolo Creek Ranch "just outside Marfa" and meet our guide for an afternoon of horseback riding! How exciting!

The scenery was beautiful!
We got lost. very lost. We wound up in Shafter, Texas... 20 minutes from Mexico. Eeeeek!
We followed the vehicle's GPS which basically led us to a dead-end off a dirt road. Our options were to continue past the dead end into an area with a "No Trespassing" sign or backtrack. Shafter looked like a forgotten shanty town or a scene from a very scary movie about flesh eating zombies. We decided to backtrack. Quickly!!

There was absolutely no cell service in the area until we got back to the highway and used the vehicle's On-Star service to call Cibolo Creek Ranch directly. We received directions and realized that we probably missed the turn because we were so enthralled with the scenery. aaaand the Cibolo sign was tiny!

Finally. We made it to our destination: Cibolo Creek Ranch, a "Historic Texas Legacy" founded in 1857  turned luxury resort.

We met our real cowboy guide, Dennis, for a tour of the property via horseback! The air was crisp and clean, the sky was huge, the area was vast. Absolutely perfect.

 

View of Cibolo Creek Ranch,  a tiny Oasis in the middle of no where.

We finished Day 2 with a communal meal served in the large common dining room where we met the 4 other resort guests. A couple from Taos and another from San Diego.
It was night by the time we finished eating and pitch black outside. We tip-toed through the property to find our room. Marci started a fire in the fireplace in our room and we snuggled up in our side by side twin beds to the sounds of the crackling fire.

DAY 3: After communal style breakfast of waffles, toast, baked potato fries, and green tea we headed out to Marfa, past Marfa!, to Valentine, past Valentine! to the tiny, strange, and quaint Prada Marfa just off Highway 90. A seemingly temporary yet permanent sculpture. The artists deemed this work "pop architectural land art project."

Our journey continued back through Marfa to Alpine where I was reunited with a few sculptures of my own. This story will be an entirely new blog entry ;) in the near future..

We mapped out our travel home as best we could with a torn map of Texas that I have owned for at least 12 years. Again, we were messmerized by the scenery and...

... got pulled over for speeding. Whoops.
The police officer was very nice and helpful as we explained that "We're from Lubbock!". He let us off with a warning and even showed us a quicker route on the map that would have us back to Lubbock in 4.5 hours!

Again, we traveled through the black of night towards our destination: Home.

This trip was an adventure filled with excitement, surprise, awe, wonder, beauty, appreciation, and left me with the sense of contentment in my heart. I absolutely love this life and feel blessed to have a wonderful traveling partner that is up for absolutely anything!

I feel inspired to travel, create, see, and remember this trip fondly forever.

travel

It has been a little over a month since I graduated from Yoga Yoga Teacher Training. The transition back into ordinary life has been a process. I am still reeling from the entire experience, and just as I settle back in I remember -- Oh yeah!, I went to yoga school!!

I ran into a friend recently who also went to yoga school this summer. He was able to relate to the unsettling feeling of settling back in to "normal" life, accepting that school is in the past, and looking forward to the path ahead.
I think he said it best: "Some people take a trip around the world. I just took a trip around the Universe."

And what a trip around the Universe it was! And it is. And it will be.

So far, Teaching yoga is a blessed experience. I remind myself daily to remain grounded and let the teachings of Yoga flow through me. Allow myself to be the medium between the teachings and the students.

Each week at the Yoga Bean (Lubbock's newest yoga studio), I teach Restorative Yoga on Friday nights, Hatha Flow on Sunday afternoons, and a private "Yoga Shala"class (from my home studio) to a couple of students on Wednesday nights.
The shift in roles between being a student and teaching the students has been good. I have been in classes with many of the other students for years and I am so thankful for the amount of encouragement I have received from them.

A few weeks ago I taught a class at the Gypsy Pow Wow, a local music and camping festival at Buffalo Springs Lake. The turn out was more than I expected! It was a wonderful way to connect the students and bring awareness to the practice of yoga. I was pleased to see a few students from the Gypsy Yoga classes that I taught this Summer and a friend (who just moved to attend Yoga Yoga Teacher Training in Austin) in the class.

 

I'm explaining the importance of  listening to your own body,
keeping your body safe, and "Being your own best teacher"

 

Gypsy Pow Wow students in Savasana (Relaxation) pose

Throughout my journey through yoga school and the path that has followed, my mind and body both changed. I was finally able to shed the excess weight that I have been working to loose for the past year and am now comfortable in my new and able bodied shape. My eating habits have been clean for the past few years so the only difference is my body's adaptability to change. If I eat foods that my body doesn't agree with -- wow, it will let me know. I also contribute this in part to my ingrained and now more exposed body awareness. My desire for mind or mood altering substances is depleting. (Which is an unexpected but welcomed change.) Caffeine has been on the way out for me for the past year or so, so this shift has not been huge. Lately, even a glass of iced tea will keep me wired all day! Alcohol and I have had a long relationship through out my life. I spent the majority of my 20's tending bar and indulging myself as well. The past year, that relationship has really subsided. And now, just as with caffeine, a glass of wine will knock me off my foundation. Which is the biggest reason that I do not desire these substances right now.

I work hard, on and off my mat to find and maintain a firm, secure, comfortable, yet gentle foundation -- so anything that shakes that foundation is not desirable.

Along with teaching, as duty to the students and myself, my own practice has grown strong. Yoga is a part of my daily life. I come to my mat everyday to connect, cultivate, and grow. Through this connection, I am able to see the changes in my body and mind.

"Yoga allows us to recognize our experience as a reflection of how the whole Universe moves -- The setting sun, the rising moon, the ebb & flow of the tides, and even the beating of our own hearts. Through awareness of our own energy we can begin to sense the greater connection."

Human Experience

The last leg of my journey, week 3 of Yoga Teacher Training, was here and then gone -- quickly. I am reeling from the adventure.
As I expected, the end was bittersweet. I looked forward to the end through the entire journey and as I lay on my yoga mat during Savasana, during our last class at teacher trainees, an hour before graduation, I let my emotions truly sink in.
I was sad to see it end.

Yoga Teacher Training was the most transformational experience of my life. My life shifted from where it was to where my heart knew it could be.
I feel more alive, awake, and aware than ever before.

"We are spiritual beings having a human experience."

 

  Yoga Yoga Austin, Hatha Flow Graduation, August 18, 2012

This experience taught me to look inside, question life and the Universe and work towards my highest and best self with trust and respect. As a result, I am closer to who I am and where I want to be in life. I realize that my life is a miracle, a precious gift from the Universe.
And I intend to live each day as such.

With the knowledge I received in Teacher Training I hope to share the beautiful gift of yoga with every being that I cross. And although, I know that not everyone has an interest in yoga -- I am hopeful that through my own nature I am able to at least spark the flame in a few people along the way just as someone did for me 4 years ago.

Namaste

Gypsy Yoga

Oh how strange the journey has been. As part of my "homework" for Yoga Teacher Training, I am required to practice teach 6 yoga classes.

Fortunately, my friends and close acquaintances have been so supportive and many students signed up to attend my yoga classes.

As I was making arrangement for students, a friend (and now student) told me of a great space that he could provide for the classes! Amazing.

The space is an old building near downtown that used to be a mailing business. My friend rents the bottom floor of the building, and the top floor stood untouched.

 

 

With the help from Jonathan and my nephew Taylor (I had to bribe him with cash and ice cream :) we were able to clear the room and clean the floor.

 

This is Jonathan with an oil based floor sweep that we used to collect and pick up the thick layer of dust on the floor. It worked wonderfully!

 

 

After sweeping the dust I spent a few hours moping the floor with a natural lavender scented cleaner. I burned incense and one of the students brought beautiful plants and a lamp to warm the space.

The 6 class series has been deemed "Gypsy Yoga" due to the natural and earthy feel of the space. And like gypsies, the students, will travel to this strange location to engage in shared energy and to practice yoga collectively.

I scheduled the first class for last Saturday. I attended a class of my own bright and early on Saturday morning at the Yoga Bean, Lubbock's newest yoga studio. One of my favorite instructors taught the class and afterward I was excited and inspired to teach my Gypsy Yoga class. 

Class #1 had only 3 students, none of which had ever stepped on a yoga mat. The class was wonderful! I felt like every word came out just as I planned in my head. And the students seemed to respond well to the instruction. I was even able to make a few adjustments to help the students in their poses. And I felt elated as I saw one student flowing through the class with the biggest grin on his face. I couldn't have asked for a better first time teaching experience.

Class #2 was not quite the same..

The class was scheduled for Monday evening. I worked all day at my office and somehow went home with a raging headache :(

I tried my best to collect myself before the class. I rolled out my mat at home and practiced the sequence that I was going to teach. I started feeling fatigued and tired, so  took an asprin and set myself straight.. or I thought I had.

The class started late. And 8 students came!

My throat started to ache as soon as I began to talk. None of the words in my head were actually coming out of my mouth. I totally forgot one of the most important parts of my class (and yoga for that matter) -- the explanation of BREATH & MOVEMENT! Ugh, by the time I realized my eggregious mistake the students were in full on Sun Salutations and 20 minutes into the class. For the sake of progress, I let it be. By this point I started to work up a sweat. I was frustrated with myself and realized that I was in control and I had no choice but to continue. More mistakes and missteps were made along the way, all I could do was keep going. Keep teaching. Keep the students safe.

The remaining 30 minutes, felt like an eternity. During the 5 minute relaxation, Savasana pose, I took the opportunity to set myself straight. I collected my thoughts and slowly began to awaken the students from their relaxation. I tried to finish the class strong and open the floor for feedback..

One student recommended that I talk more about breath work.. and another "green" student asked about breathing techniques. So OBVIOUSLY, the explanation of breath and movement would have helped the class!

I totally beat myself up after the class and almost cried on the way home. I felt like a failure and I was disappointed with myself.

I started to think of the number of yoga classes that I have attended and how many of the class I can remember, even if they were bad. I couldn't recall memory of very many bad classes. So I made myself feel better by just chalking up this experience as a learning lesson.

I pray that my classes will get better over time and that I can redeem myself during the 4 remaining Gypsy Yoga classes.

Yoga is the path. Practice (teaching) is the journey.

Module #2

Module #2 of Yoga Yoga Teacher training is finished and life is more beautiful than ever.

The experience of last week, Module #2, was dramatically different than that of Module #1. Thankfully.

I now know, that in June when I endured 7 days of YYTT -- physically I was prepared.. mentally I was not.

I thought that because I had a great yoga practice and was physically fit and healthy, that I was ready for Yoga Teacher training. However, in hindsight, I realized that mental preparation is just as important as physical preparation.

During Module #1, my mind was resisting the changes that were happening to my life. I didn't eat enough, I didn't sleep enough, and I went to Austin thinking that my life could resume as normal.
However, my mind traveled far ahead, and my body is just now catching up.

During Module #2, I mentally prepared myself for the worse. But was comforted within the first few days as I began to feel and inner peace and relaxation that had abandoned my body years ago.

I attended 2 Restorative Yoga classes while I was in Austin and left with an overall feeling of happiness. My body felt rested, peaceful, healthy, and strong.
The past 3 years, I have avoided Restorative and Yin Yoga classes simply because I thought they were boring, not "fast enough", and "not challenging enough". But that was just my ego obstructing the true path. With my ego under control, I was really able to let go and see the path.
I have a high-stress, high adrenaline, fast career and lifestyle -- so my yoga practice should be anything but that.
Now, I am not revoking my Ashtanga yoga practice by any means -- but rather adding an new element of restoration into the equation.
Restoration for my body and most importantly my mind. Yoga is beautiful path in which to connect the body and mind.

"Strong" was the word that resonated with me all week. Before the journey I prayed for "strength" and during the journey I prayed for a "strong" mind and body. The intention that I set each time I returned to my mat was "strength". And I am happy to report that my body and mind did in fact receive strength and I was able to endure the entire journey with sound body and sound mind.

During the next month, I will teach 6 beginner yoga classes as well as attend 11 public yoga classes (including Yin Yoga!) and then I will travel back to Yoga Yoga Austin for 1 final week of teacher training and GRADUATION!
And, just as those before me, I will work to spread the beautiful practice that is yoga.

Namaste

before & after

 

These photos were taken 10 months and 20 pounds apart.

The before and after need no explanation. I have been strength training for 10 months. Once a week with a trainer and 2 times on my own. Each session I work on either back and biceps, chest and triceps, or legs. 1 hour of muscle training and 30 minutes of cardio -- I love running!

These 3 days a week topped off with at least 2 yoga classes a week ;)

The road was tough but totally worth it. I feel physically and mentally stronger than I ever have!

I am so thankful for my health and ability to grow stronger. 

Yoga Yoga Teacher Training

Last week I completed a portion of what will ultimately be one (I am sure of many) of my life's most challenging journeys -- Yoga Yoga Teacher Training (YYTT).


I made my pilgrimage to Yoga Yoga in Austin last Friday after work as my first day of class was Saturday morning! I was a ball of nerves when I arrived. The 2 weeks before I left I was anticipating the journey and when I arrived I was still feeling anxious and a bit nervous about what the week ahead of me would entail.

My anxiety subsided a few hours into our initial meeting and orientation. I began to get really excited about everything I could potentially learn. Saturday and Sunday were both 8 hour days that seemed to pass rather quickly. We were lectured on the 8 Limbs of Yoga, had around 5 asana (posture) practices and a lot of snack & yogi tea breaks throughout the day. Sunday evening we left the studio at 8pm and were to return the following day at 7am.!
Monday - Friday were 9.5 hour days with an hour for lunch and a few snack & yogi tea breaks. Monday was definitely the worst of all 7 days. I was tired, exhausted, apathetic, questioning my reason for being there, home-sick, and did I mention exhausted?? Monday was one of the hardest days of my life. I started to question everything in the world.
Why am I here? How did I come to this path? Who am I? Who will I become? Will everything feel "ok" again? Is there really a "place for me in the Universe?"

I was an emotional wreck on Monday. After a long conversation and much encouragement from Jon and my Sister I told myself to stand tall and complete this task in front of me. I knew that I had the full support from everyone in my life and it was too important to turn back now. My only choice was to move forward with an open heart. So I did. I slept and when I awoke I was ready to face yet another 9.5 hour day in Yoga Teacher Training. I quickly understood that I am much more interested in philosophy and history than anatomy. But by the 4th day I decided that I should open my mind and heart to all of the material equally. The anatomy of the respiratory system was much more interesting that the psoas and the spine.

I logged my feelings at the beginning of each day (except for Day 2, I forgot :)

Day 1: "Day 1!! nervous"

Day 2:  n/a

Day 3: "exhausted"

Day 4: "rested, hopeful, calm, interested"

Day 5: "tired, ready, excited"

Day 6: "relaxed, connected, open"

Day 7: "educated, excited, happy"

During the first 7 Days of YYTT Module #1, I was completely immersed in yoga. All I could think about was yoga, the impact of yoga on my life, and just why I have come to this path in my life.
The last day of training all I could feel was relief that I HAD MADE IT. I survived. My brain was full of new and exciting information and could not be contained -- it felt like a balloon floating over my head -- not attached to my body anymore.

I felt an urgency to leave Austin. I couldn't have left quicker. I thought about leaving on Friday after class ended but decided that was a terrible idea since my brain felt unattached to my body. So after a crazy night of dreams and light sleeping I woke up at 7am and decided that it was time to go home!

Upon my arrival home, I hit the Lubbock city limits and my heart sank back down to where it came from (my throat) and I felt calm. Jonathan went to the local farmer's market that morning and bought fresh local veggies and honey as well as a beautiful new succulent. He gave me the gigantic hug that I had missed so much while I was away. He felt warm, strong, and like mine. I immediately started crying. My emotions and strength were finally broken down as I felt myself let go and accept my own vulnerability. I have never been so thankful for my partner in my entire life.

I feel lucky to have this past, present, and future life.

The first few days after my return were hard. I felt like a different person that was just going through a life that used to be mine. But, as all things do -- those feelings past. I feel different in general this week. Problems do not seem to be nearly as large as they would have before. And I can feel what can only be described as patience growing stronger. I am so very thankful to be at this point in my life. I am open to new ideas, exploring my mind and capabilities as well as learning how to spread the knowledge and teach others the practice that helped me find my true self.

In 3 weeks I will head back to Austin for Module #2 of YYTT. I feel more excited this time around because I know what to expect. And I know that as much as I feel like my brain or body has escaped   -- it will come back to me and all will be well.

Namaste

20 Under 40

Last Thursday, I was awarded an amazing honor of being named one of Lubbock's Top 20 Under 40 by the Lubbock Chamber of Commerce and the Young Professionals of Greater Lubbock. As in, the top 20 individuals under the age of 40 who are actively involved in community engagement, volunteer efforts, and who are projected to continue the positive professional growth of Lubbock, Texas.


I am truly honored and feel so very fortunate that my path in life has brought me here.

This is the new award proudly displayed on my bookshelf!

Aaaand, me with the 20 Under 40 Award (wearing my amazing $20 vintage dress that I found at Culture Clothing!)

 

I <3 LBB

love of language

Three months ago, I begin attending Sanskrit classes at the Lubbock Yoga Shala.

After my first class, the familiar and delightful feeling of being a student and learning came back to me. And I realized that I forgot what it felt like. It is a sense of learning what you did not previously know and an excitement for the knowledge that is to come.

The next few classes progressed at a very slow pace. I never knew how complex a language could be!

"The language of Saṃskṛtam is put together, constructed, well or completely formed; refined, adorned, and highly elaborated."

So, as with any language, there is a lot of material to absorb.
I found one of the most interesting aspects of Sanskrit to be the different identified areas of the mouth that letters forming words can come from. The English language is a very Dental spoken language - which is why lip-reading in English is easily distinguishable. However, the Sanskrit language consists of letters from varying mouth positions: Gutteral, Palatal, Cerebral, Dental, Labial, Semi-Vowel, Silibant, and Aspirate. So the difficulty, in fact, comes from the lack of known association. There are literally few comparisons in the English language and the Sanskrit language. Fascinating!!

The past few months our Sanskrit class has progressed at the speed of a (very slow) Kindergarten class. At one point last month, we begged our instructor for a SONG. A simple song that we could sing to remember the letters... you know, like the Alphabet Song..
Sadly, no such song exists for the Sanskrit language.


But somehow last week - everything finally started making sense to me. We have covered the 46 characters of the Devanagari (written Sanskrit) alphabet. And we are now learning how to abbreviate the characters together to form actual words.

Our big accomplishment at the end of last month was learning to spell "ghetto"!
This week we learned many many more (pictured in my sketchbook below): "Time, Neat, Water, Sangha" (Community), aaaaand "Val" "Brown"!

I absolutely love the challenge that learning a new language has brought to my life. I am thankful for the opportunity to be a student again.

Namaste

A Head

For the first time in my life, I needed "professional" headshots.
Thankfully my Sister is a seasoned and talented photographer. She is pretty much great at most things, including: making her own clothes, upcycling handbags, cooking, decorating, DIYing anything!, painting, and now photography!

We scheduled a bit of I'll-scratch-your-back-if-you-scratch-mine time one weekend. She needed a model for some new bags and headbands for her website and etsy shop and I needed headshots.

My Sister is also a great stylist,.. of course, so it was a bonus to have someone to fix my flyaway hairs and give me advice about what to wear.

These are the photos, courtesy of Marci Guthiel, that I submitted with the headshot request:

 
Aaaand one not so serious photo for good measure:

806

I attended a wonderful lecture a few weeks ago in which the guest speaker, a native of Albuquerque, NM, spoke so very highly of the city/town* of Lubbock, Texas.

*"city/town" is a term similar to that of a "man/boy". Not quite a man, not quite a boy. Example: "He's a man/boy."

The topic of the lecture was "color", how we are influenced by color, why we wear the colors that we do, and what colors we associate with or buy, etc. Pantone released the new "Color of the Year" -- Tangerine Tango! Passionate, exciting, colorful, full of life and hope. It's 2012 people!!
Definitely not my color but I can appreciate it for its modern attention grabbing edge. Recently, I designed a newspaper ad and graphics for a new TV spot employing -- THE 2012 Color of the Year: Pantone 1463!

During the lecture we formed groups and collectively decided 2 colors that were "Lubbock, Texas". The room was unanimous in picking: Brown/Gold and Sky Blue Pink. Leave it to a bunch of designers to pick 4 color blends for a 2 color assignment!

I imagine we all had an images similar to these in our minds:

My drive home from work. Lubbock, Texas 2011

  Sky Blue Pink. Lubbock, Texas 2011

Sunset. Lubbock, Texas 2011

Ooooor maybe we all had an images similar to this in our minds:

Arial View. Lubbock, Texas September 2011

 Haboob, reminiscent of the Dust Bowl. Lubbock, Texas Fall 2011

I learned that our beautiful, inspiring, humbling and unforgettable "West Texas sunset" colors are actually incredibly vibrant due to the amount of dust in our atmosphere.

The guest speaker raved that she had recently traveled in every major city in Texas: Dallas, Houston, Austin, and (as she said) "San Antone" and was pleasantly surprised to see more economic growth and construction in Lubbock than any other Texas city at the present time!

Most Lubbockites know that the cost of living in the Lubbock area is far below the national average. And as a result of this low cost of living both employers and their employees benefit from a higher standard of living for less than almost anywhere else in the nation.
We have real estate investment opportunities among us, a fantastic job market with just enough room to come together as a community yet friendly compete with each other. Oh, and we have a pretty great Art and Music scene too!

Now, if we could only get some water...

 San Marcos, Texas 2010

The Kind Life

Just as many do around the first of the year, I decided to make a few resolutions of my own:

- work less/make more time for friends
- embrace a complete vegan diet
- start a compost
- start a rainwater collection

I made great strides toward my first 2 resolutions in the first few weeks of the New Year. For my birthday, I hosted a Vegan Birthday Brunch.


I crafted these "paper balls" from an old newspaper and used them as a hanging center piece. (My girlfriend Claire crafted the really wild ones)

The simple recycled craft paper table runner dawned these beautiful fresh flower and soy candles.

The menu --
Cafe M's Vegan Benedict with Smart Bacon
Almond Cocoa Pancakes
Tiny Toasts with Grape Jelly
Fruit Salad with Soy Yogurt
Fresh juiced Orange and Apple juice

aaaand Mimosas, Bloody Marys, and Screwdrivers. Brunch staples.
None of my friends are Vegan (or Vegetarian) however, they are very open minded and tried all of the food. There were rave reviews!
The food was delicious and the company was lovely.
The attendees (a few neighbors, including one  that I met in yoga class and had never hung out with, a few old friends, and some very new ones as well) all got along wonderfully.

The Vegan Birthday Brunch is going down in my culinary experience as a success!

Sunshine

My arms and legs are still beaming from what could truly be considered a Yoga Marathon. My first but definitely not last.

It was my year of many many firsts:
- First year juicing
- First year strength training
- First year of working (not interning) at an Agency
- First year to buy a car (by myself)

AND - First year to complete around 100 of 108 Sun Salutations at Yoga Yoga Austin!

The class (marathon) began at 1:00pm on New Year's Day which to me really meant no acting wild on New Year's Eve. Which for the first time (another first) I openly accepted. Ringing in the New Year felt like wiping my slate clean. Which is what I have heard is the mental thought associated with A Sun Salutation. It all seems to align perfectly.
So, I spent the evening with a few friends in Austin. I had my obligatory glass of champagne at Midnight and shortly after I was off to bed!
I woke up bright and early on New Year's Day, a sense of renewal already brewing in my heart. I drove the desolate streets of South Austin to Juice Planet where I found a few other early birds. 1 Mean Green juice later I started feeling pretty excited.
I showered and dawned my yoga costume.

The studio was packed! As soon as I walked in the door I saw a sweet friend of mine from Art School! We squeezed our mats close in together. The entire room was filled with mats all around 6 inches apart. Wow!
Three rounds of OM left my ears vibrating with positive energy as we started in.

The Surya Namaskar A series went as follows:

1. Mountain Pose (Tadasana)
2. Standing Backbend
3. Swan Dive to Forward Fold (Uttanasana)
4. Inhale and look forward
5. Jump back to Plank Pose
6. Up Dog (Urdhav Mukha Svanasana)
7. Downdog (Adho Mukha Svanasana), hold for 3 breaths
8. Jump forward to Forward Fold (Uttanasana)
9. Inhale and look forward
10. Standing Backbend
11. Mountain Pose (Tadasana)

The first 10 or 12 were smooth. By 12 or 13 I started to sweat. A lot. Somewhere??, who knows where.. around 45 my sweat began to go up my nose -- because of the amount of time spent inverted: forward fold, downdog, forward fold. I began to cut my "hold for 3 breaths" to "hold for 1 breath" and spent the 2 residual breaths in Mountain Pose so my sweat could drip down my face rather than up. I also had to start using my shirt to wipe down my face. Not a great class to forget a towel! Eeekk.
My arms felt warm and the 8. Jump forward to Forward Fold began to seem quite difficult. This must have been the point when I took my first Child's Pose. Just a simple seated resting pose. I hoped back up and started again reminding myself that I should treat each Sun Salutation as it were the first. Retain integrity.
The first time I looked at the clock it was 2:30 - I decided in my mind that I was DONE. I was ready to roll up the mat and say "Good Enough" -- the class was come-and-go, a handful of students had already left and a few came in throughout the practice. Just as I was ready to quit, one of the instructors came in and announced "Alright everyone, we are at 80!" We all started to yell and scream. I quickly decided that if I HAD MADE IT TO 80, that I could certainly go all the way! Stick to it.
I took a few more Child's Pose throughout the last 28. And took a few forward lunges into forward fold eliminating the jump forward. WHEW~
Counting is a great technique that I use in my Strength Training sessions. I seem to work well in numbers -- So, I tried to count the last 28 in my head. My brain was focused only on the finish so I lost count somewhere around 4! But I rolled with it keeping in mind that this would end. It would not continue forever. Just as all things in life -- this challenge too would end.

I persevered on -- the instructor announced "LAST ONE!!!" We all started to yell and scream again! We finished the 108th Sun Salutation around 3:00pm. It was followed by an amazing cool down and a 5 minute Savasana (RELAXATION POSE).
The practice was followed with a loud round of applause. I reached over and hugged my friend, neither of us cared that we were dripping in sweat. We rolled up our mats and were greeted with warm tea as we exited the studio.

Right after class, I headed to pick up my riding buddy, as we were scheduled to leave for Lubbock that day. I ended up letting him take over and drive because my head was swimming in happiness, I couldn't get the grin off my face, and I felt high on life -- and on yoga. (Not sure if that is considered a legal intoxication).

This was truly one of the most AMAZING experiences. I predicted that I could get to around 75. I never dreamed that I could go all the way!! I am so thankful to have the ability in this lifetime to experience something so incredible.

So much happiness into the first day of 2012! Namaste

the only constant in life

Change.

The Holidays are usually a good time marker in which we can stand and reflect back on the past year and look forward to the new year upon us.

I was finally able to spend some time with my family which included a visit to see my Grandmother yesterday. She is a very strong woman living with advanced Alzheimer's. She told me, in Spanish, the same story over and over for about an hour of how she only had 3 children and was very naive when she married at age 19. She adamently said -- "it's wasn't like like it is today."

Being at my Grandmother's house reminded me of the part of my childhood that I somehow have not forgot.
Growing up, each year my Grandparents would have a New Year's Eve slumber "party" for all of the grandkids. We would stay up late and watch Grandma cook cinnamon buñuelos. We would pop open sparkling cider, sound our noisemakers as we counted down to Midnight! I think that my Grandparents enjoyed it just as much as we did.

Ah, to be young!

The Road to Grandma's House

This year, I received a special Christmas gift from my Parents--
A few months ago, I flew to Austin and somehow in the Airport shuffle I lost the ring that my Mom had given me on my 28th Birthday. I thoroughly enjoyed my time in Austin but my hand felt strange because it was missing the ring that I had worn for almost 4 years. I called the Airport a few times but my ring was never reported or returned.
So, for Christmas this year,.. My Parents replaced the ring for me! Hooray, It feels so great to have my ring back! I slept with the ring on my finger on Christmas Eve and woke up with that excited feeling on Christmas day as I realized that I had my ring back.
I will aim to responsibly hold onto this one for as long as possible.

As I feel myself age into a more mature "Me", I feel so conscious and aware of my life, my past, and of course my future.
I feel that the past year was challenging and presented me with many situations in which really reinforced who I am. Not who I was, nor who I will become -- but who I am now.

I am so thankful.

+

The only constant in life is change.

I am a habitual creature of life. I enjoy seeing my living room rug lined up with the base boards, wearing head to toe neutral colors (mainly black and grey, but I am open to white, off-white, tan, or brown), eating meals at 8:00AM, 10:00AM, 12:00PM, 3:00PM, and 8:00PM, drinking 64 oz of water throughout the day out of my WholeFoods BPA-free water bottle, making fresh juice each morning, working out at the gym 3 times and taking in 2 yoga classes per week, and -- I like knowing what I am doing, how I am doing it, and when it will be done.

However. Within the past month. My life has changed.
For the better. I was recruited for a job as a Designer at the Price Group, which is a local Advertising Agency. My new work environment really reminds me of Sibley Peteet, where I interned in Austin in 2007. It is laid back, busy, creative, fun and overall a blast. My first 2 weeks at my new job I have designed: newspaper ads, a wrap-around label for a Voodoo mail piece, re-typeset an election letter for the Mayor, and I sewed a tiny Voodoo doll. Next I am working on our Company Christmas card and a proposal to build a new clinic for the Lubbock VA. All of that topped off with a staff Karaoke Happy Hour. wow.

I bought a new car! Which is something that I have not done in 9 YEARS! Cleaning out my little Cavalier that I have owned for the past 9 years brought a bit of nostalgia. It felt good to let go of one thing and welcoming embrace another.
I bought a new car that is very much me: simple, efficient, safe, modern, and of course black.

I feel so fortunate to be experiencing the vast amount of change in my life lately. It feels like things are falling into place. And my path is becoming clearer.

I am one lucky girl.

Momentum

Riding the waves of momentum.

Last night I saw the Junior Boys live. They are definitely one of my favorite bands and I had yet to see them perform live.. until last night.
They sounded crisp, clear, and beautiful. Just as I imagined they would.

I have felt this wave of perspective shift coming on me for the past few months. And now I believe that I am in it -- riding it like I am scared to do but know that I must.

Something is changing in me and my life. I have questioned myself, my being, my contribution, and my worth as I stood on the brink. And I have accepted that the only thing that I know for certain is that I do not have the answers.

I do not have it all figured out. I am far from knowing where I will go in life, how I will get there, or what it will be like when I am there -- That is the only certain thought that I have.

Strength

 
photo courtesy of Seane Corn Photobucket

As I have blogged about many times the past few years -- Yoga is an integral part of my life. It completes my day, balances me, and leads me towards my path in life.

I realized recently that my yoga practice has some what plateaued in that I have seen much progress in the past few years from having zero core strength to now balancing in headstand! -- however, the past few months have seen very little progression. I am not regressing -- thank goodness. But there are many poses that I would love to incorporate into my repertoire -- however, my body is simply unable. :(


So, I made the decision to begin Strength Training with a personal trainer.


For the sake of taking my yoga practice to the next level, I am all in. 100%.
My Strength Training began with an overall body assessment -- which was frightening and interesting all at the same time. My trainer determined that my diet was in tip-top shape however -- my work out habits were not. I, in fact, had plateaued my progress.

So, an hour after learning so much about the muscles of the body and how one does in fact build muscle strength -- I committed myself to 1 YEAR of Strength Training. 3 times a week. 45 minutes of either Chest & Triceps, Back & Biceps, or Legs + 30 minutes of cardio + 1-2 Yoga classes a week.
!!!


During my first work out, with my Trainer by my side, I felt the sudden impulse to spew. (sorry for the graphic content) ugh, yeah. I felt like throwing up. I held it all in and began to feel normal again a few hours afterward. The same impulse during work out #2. Ugh. However, we are on WEEK 3 and all is well. No more spew feeling. Just the feeling of accomplishment!
I am not going to say that I love going to the gym/working out almost every day of the week, and the thought of being dedicated to this schedule for the next year is almost too much to handle - however, it feels great to know that I have tackled this challenge and I am sticking with it. Progressing forward.

And, I am excited to see which yoga poses my strong future will afford me.
Hopefully:
Side Crow
Handstand
Forearm Balance

+ many many more :)

Namaste

Value

I haven't blogged in a few months -- simply because I have (again) been contemplating the value of my thoughts. With so many Twitter thoughts, Facebook thoughts, Blogs thougths, Articles, and "sharing" from around the world-- it's vast out there! --  it is easy to get lost.

Recently, I read an article (thank goodness for that online "sharing")
The Top 5 Regrets That People Have on Their Deathbeds
A bit of a morbid idea which translated into something quite beautiful.

#2. Regret:
I wish I didn’t work so hard. 

was the one that really hit home.

For at least the past few years I have been a serious workaholic. I let my work, stress me out, get me down, make me sick, consume my life, come between my family/friends and I, and I almost let it destroy my relationship. My life has been my work. And my work has been my life.

Upon closer examination of just how much my work means to me, I realized that my life and my happiness are worth so much more. I will never be the person who doesn't take pride in my work or simply doesn't work! -- but I realize that I have a life outside of work too.

With that idea burning a hole in my head, I decided to start limiting my "work hours" -- meaning: I realize that everyone (yes, even me) needs time off to stop, regroup, collect and breathe.

The first few nights of my new practice were hard. The thoughts of my To-Do list were looming in my head and I felt guilty for "wasting time". But the weekend rolled around and in between: yoga, running, swimming, cleaning, lunching with friends, hanging out with my family -- it seemed like nothing was missing but so much was gained.

And what is more, the past few weeks I start my week refreshed and ready to productively, efficiently and happily tackle my To-Do list with a clear head. The few hours + days off each week have really started to make me love my life more than ever before.

So, I look forward to my new and found again hobbies.
I remember a time when I was an artist..

March on!

wow.
March is over? Really!

The other day, I mentioned to my Dad how time in my life seems to passing fast lately. He said "there is a reason it's called 'Over the Hill' after you hit 40. When you get to the top of the hill -- that is your life passing slowly. When you go over the hill that is when your life starts passing fast."
I can't image how I will feel in 9 years when I am "Over the Hill" and snowballing down! Whew ~ I also can't believe that I am only 9 years away from 40. Where has all of the time gone? :)

When we stop, take time and notice the passing of our lives it can be a good time to reflect on where we've been, what we've done, and importantly -- what we will do next.

In my blog post from last June,  I boasted of my beautiful DAM (Downtown Art Market) find:

The circle in the image above is the same succulent that looks like this today:

3 of the succulents from the original, including this one, had transplants into new pots. This one has roots!, a long stem, and now a baby!!
In a little under a year look at how much this guy has accomplished. And next? -- who knows.. I see more sprout ling babies and an even longer stem in the future.

Life is exciting as it happens -- if you take time to notice people, places and things around you growing just as fast as you are.